The Kissing Picture

I sit here in the quiet corner of our master bedroom, my pink laptop resting upon my cleanly shaven legs. My hair remains wet and tangled following my post workout shower. This wing-backed chair in our bedroom is where I like to write. There are days when this feels like the only quiet corner in the house. The rain taps away on the roof just outside our window and both children are currently occupied. Kai is down for his afternoon nap, and Elizabeth is engrossed in a project in her room. My mug of green tea steams to my left, right in front of the picture Josh gave me for Christmas in 2006. We often forsake gifts in an effort to spend that money on “experiences” instead. He presented me with this “surprise” gift in our bedroom on Christmas Eve after our guests and kids had gone to bed. He wanted to be sure no one else was around.

When I opened it, I found a mated picture of us kissing in front of a waterfall in Colorado. We took the trip in late September to visit his brother and somehow I decided that we needed a picture of Josh and I kissing. His brother took various shots trying to get it right. Unfortunately, kissing for a picture sounds a lot easier than it is. We kept laughing. His brother would take one and it would be just the side of my face, or the angle looked odd, all noses and ears. We tried many times to get it right without much luck. In this picture, the best of the group, my lips form a tightly puckered “o”, while Josh’s lips press together in a restrained smile, the muscles in his jaw tensed to hold back the laughter. He totally humored me with the “kissing project”, good naturedly going along with it , even if it seemed pretty silly at the time.

Below the picture, on the open space of the mated area Josh hand wrote these words in fine black ink:

Dear Kate,

Thank you for everything you do…

Thank you for everything you are.

You bring absolute joy to every aspect of my life.

I love you more than words or images can express!

Love,

Josh

I wake up to that photo and letter each day. I am trying my best to stay with this writing. It challenges me. Each time I write I shake off the negative thoughts encouraging me to give up, telling me that it is all just crap. At times, I think starting the blog or any other aspiring writing projects are a really bad idea, and like the picture, maybe just a silly project. And yet, that picture proved to be the one of the best gifts I have ever received. Today, while I may not find the right words or confidence to express myself, I sit here, so thankful that on Christmas Eve, 2006 my husband did.